The City of Troy, New York, "Where Henry Hudson Turned Around."

Tuesday, November 03, 2015

ENDORSEMENTS



Now, for the much awaited Troy Polloi endorsements.* Yes, many have requested our support but few are chosen. We sat down for an extensive, in-depth interview with each candidate, followed by a complete physical and credit check. Every candidate for each office brings their own limitations and weaknesses. Their own  set of skills that need to be honed. So, if we don't endorse you, please don't take it personally. You are all special, unique snow flakes.

We  applaud all those who are running, be they Democrat, Republican, WFP or Green. Sincerely, it takes a lot to put yourself out there for the acceptance or rejection of your fellow citizen. A loss stings, even when it is expected. The head might say one thing but the heart always holds out hope for a miracle. If you do lose, remember, the voters will still want to be friends. Just give them some space.

DISTRICT 1 - ?

Ryan (D) or Gulli (R)? No endorsement. It has almost been impossible to find out anything about these two candidates.


DISTRICT 2 - STAY HOME

Robertson (D) or McGrath (R)? A hyperbolic jackass V. a simple jackass. We go with a write-in candidate. Any write-in candidate. Vote for Shaggy or Daphne.


DISTRICT 3 - STEELE

Bodnar (R) against Steele (D). We go with Sue Steele. She's a hard worker who will represent the district well.


DISTRICT 4 - THOMAS

Doherty (D)  faces off against Navarra (R) and Colin Thomas (G). We endorse Colin Thomas, the Green Party candidate, because, why the hell not. Lets give him a shot. We also like his campaign photograph with that over-the-shoulder ingĂ©nue look. Quite fetching.


DISTRICT 5 - KOPKA

Kopka (D) v Casey (R) v Bissember (WFP). Kopka. No question. She's smart, actually reads the Charter and knows what questions to ask.


DISTRICT 6 - ?

Donohue (R) v. D'Arcy (D). No endorsement. Neither of these guys looks like an asshole so...whatever.



AT-LARGE

Nine candidates, what to do, what to do.

CARY DRESHER (D) - He can be a real star.

ERIN SULLIVAN-TETA (D) - Has earned another term.

ANASHA CUMMINGS  (WFP) - We like the big fella. Could be a breath of fresh air.  Or...

PEGGY KOWNACK (WFP) - She has actually accomplished things, such as the revitalization a little league. That's a lot more than some of the candidates have done. We can't make up our minds between Kownack and Cummings. Neither will win so it doesn't matter.



MAYOR

MADDEN -D No surprise here. Madden has run a positive campaign focusing on his executive experience. Clearly a better choice than Republican Gordon (who just won't promise us a job). According to his detractors, Madden is either a pawn of the Democrat "bosses" or a secret Republican, infiltrating the opposition party. We liked him because he wasn't salivating over the prospect of being mayor.

If Madden doesn't take the prize, we hope it's Wiltshire. Wiltshire's bold move is hard not to admire. He's turned a blowout into what we think will be a close-run contest. This is the first time since Pattison v. Jimino that we don't have a clear idea of who is favored to win. Dull, it ain't. For a blog, that's all you can ask.



CHARTER

No position. This will probably pass if people remember where to find it. The only part of the changes we are unsure of is the Council President changes. Seems clunky and unnecessary. Also, the Council President will have to give up the seat if they want to run for mayor. Lacks drama. A typical Troy thing to do. We do like changing the name to Magna Troy Carta




* The Troy Polloi endorsement has been scientifically proven to be worth an additional +3.7% 

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Personally, I'm voting for Hanging Chad. Never has one done so much for our democratic process than Hanging Chad did in 2000; and in my book, that deserves a vote, of sorts.

- Vespasian

Anonymous said...

Pussy.

Anonymous said...

We think Troy's next Mayor will receive less than 40% of the vote (final tally will be around 38% - 34% - 28%).

We also believe that candidates not endorsed by either of the two major parties are time-wasters and spoilers who don't understand how important it is to be a "team player".


Signed,

Bernie Sanders and Jesse Ventura

Phana24JG said...

No endorsement in D2? Seriously?? I am not asking for you to serve as the president of the MM fan club, but when Miss Amerikka is the opposition, I can't believe you don't find Mark the compelling choice.

Anonymous said...

Gordon will take this easy. You suck. The bible says the woman is subservient to the man. He must be able to exert his power or he is emasculated like all you secular humanist hippie types.

Anonymous said...

Jesse, you were a lousy worker in the ring.
.....Vince

Phana24JG said...

6.27, Jesse was not very good in the ring, but he played the kayfabe very well. He was one of the best until the Undertaker got really good and The Rock came along.

Anonymous said...

Maybe not great in the ring, but a great mic worker and almost spot on predicting the final percentages in the City of Troy's Mayoral Race...